It Takes A Village

Truth: I am so glad January is over. If that month had one more day, i was going to have a full blown anxiety attack.

In order to get February kicked off right, I decided to take a ginormous step out of my comfort zone. After being encouraged by countless mommy friends to find out if my teeny tiny town has a Mothers of Preschoolers or MOPS group, I did. And it is not teeny, tiny.

There were probably forty to fifty mommies, mommies to be and mommy role models. Where did all these women my age with kids come from? Turns out, I even kind of sort of knew one of them because her husband works with Husband. For someone who is an extroverted introvert, I fully anticipated going in and being friendly if approached but was okay with mainly being ignored. Not the case. I was greeted warmly by a woman with a darling two month old strapped to her chest (Boba wrap for the win). She got Monkey and I name tags and assigned us to a table where again I was welcomed. The table leader had a personality as bright as her awesome fluorescent pink shirt. She showed me where the nursery was and here is where I bust out the Proud Mom t-shirt. Monkey walked in, let me put him down and just started toddling around while the four other kids were crying their eyes out. One of the volunteers handed him a toy and I was completely forgotten about. I left crossing my fingers that he would play nicely (and so would the other moms).

It was exactly what my soul needed. I have a great internet support group of women, some of whom I consider my best friends. However, there's something about sitting across from someone telling them about your son's obsession with books and having them nod along in solidarity. They get it. They've been there. They can still quote Little Blue Truck line by line. One mom even gave me her number and was like hey my kids are a little older but let's get together and have a play date. I don't care if your kids have their own kids, yes! Please be my friend. Please help me prove that I'm not as pathetic as I think I am when I realize I don't know anyone in a town I've lived in for three years.

This was an experience I can't wait to repeat. Every first and third Wednesday from 9:15 to 11:15,you will find me in at Faith Baptist Church. I'm looking forward to being a part of this group and maybe someday giving a new mom my own number and saying hey let's get together.

PS If you're interested in finding a MOPS group near you or maybe starting your own chapter, start at MOPS.org.

Back when I had friends. And a waist.

Life Happens

I wish I knew where to begin with this post. The past few days have been obnoxiously overwhelming. Monkey had his first trip to the ER after a constant dry cough turned into wheezing which turned into struggling for breath. We are now the proud owners of a nebulizer and I've regressed sleep wise to when Monkey was about eight months old and I was still getting up once during the night to feed him. This has done nothing for my ability to be a productive employee and/or boss. I am thankful for the grace that was extended to me because of course none of this would happen on my days off.

I'm also beyond thankful for my partner in parenthood. From helping to get Monkey's prescription dropped off to taking a sick day to stay home to administer breathing treatments so I could go to work, you name it Husband did it. True love and I probably haven't done a very good job lately expressing my thanks since between PMS and sleep deprivation, I'm a biotch. Bi to the otch.

Ironically, I joined the #NoExcuses #Sweatpink challenge this year for fitness and it seems that's all I have these days. Excuses. By the time I put Monkey in his bed (and thank you Binky for all the sleep training encouragement because now he goes down like a boss), I'm stumbling around the house like a drunk because I'm too tired to walk straight. It's not uncommon for me to be in bed before the sun goes down because I know I will be up to greet it in the morning (all ugly thoughts for someone who loved life as a night owl).

What does one do when they realize that they are behind in getting ahead? (No really, this is not a rhetorical question, I really want to know what you do) I personally planning on just jumping back in the program on Sunday. If I tried to go back and make up all the challenges I already missed, I know for myself, that would be more discouraging than just admitting I fell off the wagon and jumping back on. I mean really, who makes the wagon back up just so they can see a repeat of the scenery? That's the perfect definition for the opposite of progress.

So here's your gratuitous picture of Monkey. And a gentle reminder that whatever I do, the choices I make, are not just having an effect on me. Thanks kid for the swift kick in the pants.

Feeling bad, looking good

Hide yo' kids, Hide yo' veggies

Source

This year in an effort to be more consistent with Goal #3 (and #1 too I suppose), I'm taking part in the #NoExcuses #SweatPink challenge. Back when I was a good little blogger (and runner), I became an SweatPink Ambassador or SPA. It's a great community of physically active bloggers who want to change the world one burpee at a time.

So as part of the challenge, every Sunday for the entire year, we receive an email that lays out a different task for each day of that week. I've done squats, ran/walked a mile and for today, I'm sharing a healthy snack with you. As if all my recipes weren't super healthy. Pffft. As if.

Becoming a mom put so much of life into perspective. Especially when it comes to food. From eating right while nursing to keep up supply and provide nutrients to now feeding a ever eating toddler (seriously, I cringe when I think about the teenage years of watching my kid go to the fridge at stare into only to come out with the fixings for a Dagwood sandwich).

Now I know how to eat to maintain a healthy lifestyle. I lost thirty pounds before I had Monkey by doing so. That was when I only had me to worry about. There was no teething, roaring, pooping pterodactyl screaming in my ear for me to put something, anything in front of him to devour. One of my biggest challenges is veggies. I'll eat them all day long. In fact, I even have favorite vegetables (asparagus, lima beans and peas are my top three. Stop gagging you big baby). Husband, on the other hand, will only eat corn. And not even corn in a variety of ways. Just corn or corn on the cob. Guess what vegetable I hate? Corn. And I actually loathe corn on the cob (my biggest nightmare involves eating corn on the cob and discovering that the dental floss factory has burned down).

So what's a girl to do to make sure her child is getting a balanced diet? She purees the shizz out of veggies and puts them in everything. No really, EVERYTHING.

Last night I opened a can of beets (small can, I wasn't even confident to begin with) to introduce to Monkey. Bad, just bad (how are these things a super food?!). Even I wouldn't try them. So bad. Rather than waste them because there are starving kids in China (thanks maternal unit for that therapy session), I pureed the beets with some frozen spinach, frozen fruit (I used a no sugar added blend) and water and voila! That puree will go in Monkey's oatmeal (part of his high iron diet). It will go in his plain Greek yogurt. Perfect for adding to pancakes and waffles. I may even spread some on his toast. Winning!

Beet Puree

Printable Version

1 8oz can sliced beets

1/4 cup frozen chopped spinach

1/2 cup frozen fruit of choice

water (enough to help liquify)

Place all ingredients in blender. Blend until desired consistency. (Mine was smoothie like)

Here's Hoping Beauty Doesn't Have 20/20 Vision

There's a lot going on in this house most days. So much so that I now get up at five AM just to have some me time. It's no wonder that a lot of days, I feel like something the cat dragged in (and based on my Instagram photos, I tend to look like it as well). Luckily, I have managed to get in the routine of mascara, blush and lip gloss. That tends to keep the zombieness in check.

It's hard to feel beautiful when you look in the mirror and all you see is someone who idolizes Rip Van Winkle. Since delivering Monkey safely and securely into this world, nothing fits the same. Pants don't fit the same, bras don't fit the same, hell even my skin doesn't fit the same. I live in fear of the day Monkey wants to find mommy's belly button in public. Anyone in the near vicinity will surely be turned to stone if they catch a glimpse of what lies beneath my spit up stained jump rope t-shirt from my freshman year of college.

What does make me feel beautiful, though, is when I open the bedroom door after giving up with trying to find clothes that don't scream "my hips were made for birthing!" and keeping my hair in place (I should really know better than to try and do anything with my curly hair on days when it's raining), and there stands my boys. And when Husband says to Monkey, "Look it's a pretty flower. Can you say pretty flower?" and Monkey claps his hands in approval, I glow from my unpainted toes to my split ends. Nothing makes me feel more beautiful than being acknowledged by my two favorite people.

Source

And cheesecake. Cheesecake makes me feel beautiful. It's like the healthiest dessert there is when smothered in strawberries.

*Food Friday* Husband Friendly Burritos! Ole!

Those of you who have been reading this blog for any length of time know that it is a rare occasion where Husband takes a second helping of something. Like million dollar in plain view on eccentric grandma's coffee table book rare. And yet when I was trying to figure out a way to use up an excess of couscous sitting in my fridge with burrito sized tortillas, I apparently hit it out of the park with this recipe. Even Monkey had seconds (and will actually have thirds tomorrow at daycare).

Feel free to substitute ground beef for ground turkey. I'm a budget conscience grocery shopper so I regularly interchange the two. Keep in mind that when you're using ground turkey, you really want to over season the meat. It's rather bland without the extra BAM!

This was also the first time I didn't hear Husband whine about my use of rice in my burrito/taco/enchilada filling. I'm half Puerto Rican; I grew up eating A LOT of rice. It's like pasta to Italians or bread to Germans. It didn't even cross my mind that Husband might not potentially like rice. Who doesn't like rice? I mean, it's just rice; it's like tofu and takes on whatever flavor you throw on it. But he doesn't like rice and I don't like picky eaters, so I get an earful at least every other week when rice makes it's way on to the menu. This time, I didn't hear a peep about the couscous. Makes me wonder what else I could get away with. Quinoa perhaps? Make some cauliflower? The possibilities are (kinda sorta) endless!

Husband Friendly Burritos

Printable Version

1lb ground turkey

1 cup frozen chopped spinach

1 can low fat refried black beans

1 cup cooked couscous

1 teaspoon minced garlic

4 burrito sized tortillas

1 8oz package shredded cheddar cheese

Seasoning salt (to taste)

pepper (to taste)

cumin (to taste)

Sour Cream

Brown ground turkey in medium pan over medium heat. Add frozen spinach while browning. Season generously. Add garlic when meat is almost completely down cooking. When everything is completely cooked through, add refried beans. Stir in until hot. Add couscous. Heat through. Place meat mixture in tortilla, top with cheese and sour cream.

Islands in the Stream, That is Where I Am

Let's face it: it's winter. Even here on the Oregon Coast where our weather is relatively mundane (although, any local will tell you, don't like the weather, give it fifteen minutes), we are still experiencing winter-like conditions. On New Year's Day, I welcomed in the new year with a run. Even with what felt like enough layers to keep a polar bear warm, I almost froze my Puerto Rican coconuts off. When I came back inside, my cheeks and lips were so cold, that as they thawed, I could not talk. I could not talk because I could not move any muscles on my face.

The only thing that kept me going through that very cold run was the image I had of warm Mediterranean beaches. Crystal blue water, white stone buildings, big bright sun. Lately I've been obsessed with the thought of vacationing in Greece or some other warm beachy place in that region. Someplace that I can stuff my face with amazing local cuisine and then lay like a bloated beached whale, sizzling in the sun while my son covers me in sand and my husband pokes me in the bum because he likes to see it jiggle. In my dreams, though, the sand never sticks to your feet and the second you step off the beach, it magically disappears never to be tracked into your car, house, or butt crack.

I plan another trip to those near perfection beaches very soon because the girls need walked and Husband is thoroughly ensconced in NCIS:New Orleans. He will soon be replaced with a tanned golden cabana boy holding a fruity drink with a cute little umbrella.

Dream...(Source)

Reality. I'm pretty sure this accurately sums it up. Source

I would love to hear where your dream vacation destination is. Extra points if includes cabana boys.

Team DCG

After five years of marriage, Husband has finally caught on that if he goes and gets ice cream, it behooves him to bring me some as well. Salted Caramel Core Ben and Jerry's tonight. Now some of you may be sitting there smirking and saying to yourselves, "MY husband did that while we were dating." Good for you. And good for him for that matter. Now go on your merry LL Bean catalog life way because this blog is not for you.

Here in the DCG household, we still leave wet towels on the bed and get into arguments over who is going to load the dishwasher. We snark over who lightened the bank account last and refuse sex because it's been over a year since we've slept through the night (holy hell, what is this we business? I haven't slept through the night in over a year and I'm only slightly bitter about it). Five years of marriage and over a decade as a couple and let me tell you, I'm pretty sure we know less now than we did in our teens.

I mean shoot, we both got up every night for the six weeks Monkey slept in our room. We traded off bath time. Now we trade off who gets up and gives the monk his morning bottle. We make career changes after having long discussions with one another and make family time a priority. Husband is taking on cooking responsibilities so that on his two days home with our son he can cook. I've learned it's super important to point the penis down inside the diaper. It's like we're a team or something.

A dysfunctional team that sometimes finishes next to last and most of the time only gets the participants ribbon, but a team none the less.

Decisions, Decisions

It had crossed my mind to delete this blog. To get rid of my Facebook page for this blog. To admit defeat when it comes to being a blogger. And I think I'd be justified.

In February, it will be two years since I last wrote anything here. It's actually quite humorous that my blogging sabbatical came in correlation with my pregnancy. Yep that's right, I'm a mommy. To a human baby. We call him Monkey (like as a nickname; we gave him two middle names, that was cruel enough). We've moved a few more times and are in a house now (still renting, sorry mom). No more guinea pigs and the same dogs. Still have a personal blog filled with pictures of the Monkey. New jobs for Husband and me. I even started my own business.

With all that going on, I'd be crazy to think I could get back into the swing of blogging things. But if there's anything that motherhood has taught me (and honestly, I didn't know shizz before I became a parent), that you need a little crazy to keep you sane.

Will there still be food recipes? Probably. But you try cooking with a tiny person who thinks Mandie qualifies as a hot dog. Pinterest projects? Oh man I can't stop laughing. An honest examination of the life of someone who should have it together but doesn't? As long as you don't mind my sleep deprived rambling, then yes that's exactly what you'll find here. Will this blog look like it used to? Nope, not at all. I don't look the same after two years (thank you stretch marks and grey hair), so why would my blog? I won't promise that I won't take another long break or quit altogether or that I'll let you know if I do either. That's the beauty of blogging.

I Like Chocolate Cake

I have no words for this week. No menu, no ohmigosh I burned air, no my house is a domestic disaster (this is a big duh). None of that, just this picture:



 

WE MET GABRIEL IGLESIAS!

 

I had bought tickets for Husband's birthday back in November. We were the second ones in line for the tickets at the casino and almost missed the start of my second 5k. Completely worth it.

 

Then, before the show, Husband surprised me with my little Fluffy doll...and arm bands to get into the meet and greet afterward! I had a permagrin on my face the entire night. We loved the show. The two acts that opened up for him were his friends Martiiiiiiiiiiiin! Moreno and Rick Gutierrez. Gabriel did all new stuff and some of the old. He could've been reading the constitution and we would've laughed.

 

It was such a wonderful night. It has been a very long time since Husband and I spent any amount of time out on the town and I'm so glad we did. Especially since we followed it up with an outing to the Seafood and Wine Festival the next day. But that's another post.

No Time to Say Hello Goodbye

The past week has been out of control crazy and this week isn't looking much better. A couple of updates:

 

1) Mandie is doing much better. I check her urine twice a day (she just loves peeing on a paper towel)and haven't noticed anymore red since day two of the antibiotics our fabuloso vet put her on (big shout out to Dr. Malter at Oceanlake Veterinary).

 

2) The biggest change for our family this week came in the form of getting rid of our non-family friendly car. Yes, that's right folks, Husband bought this undomestic diva a very domestic vehicle. A Subaru! Happy early Valentine's Day to me.

 

I've wanted a Subaru since I was in high school and it's all I ever talk about owning (besides a Lamborghini, dream big girls, dream big). The Mustang was supposed to be a Subaru but sometimes I let Husband have his way when he shouldn't. Either way, we are now the super stoked owners of a 2010 Subaru Impreza. Pictures as soon as she gets a bath. Oh and suggestions for names welcome.

 

That's it in the the what's new here category. Didn't manage to get out and walk the dogs as much as I would've like because the weather finally remembered that this is the Oregon Coast and it started to rain again. I'm aiming for five out of seven days this week. Still no running on the horizon but believe me when I do, I'm looking at all hill work.

 

I can't believe the amount of stuff that I need to accomplish. Between paying bills, cleaning, laundry, getting Melodie's nails cut, grocery shopping and the list that never ends, I should not be writing; however, my sanity requires me to take a moment and breath. So here I sit.

 

It's amazing that I even had time to cook at all. We did break our no eating out rule big time, so this week's menu isn't nearly as exciting as last week's. However, now that I have Husband on board with eating at home more (he saw how much we really did save and rather enjoyed having something for lunch too), the menus should go back to being rather complete. Here are this week's:

 

 



 

Kathy's Delicious Slow Cooker Chicken

Literally fall off the bone fantastic. A little prep work with getting the skin off and I didn't use a whole chicken. I used bone in chicken breast halves and they worked perfectly. Perfect Sunday dinner. 

 

Johnsonville Chipotle Monterey Jack Cheese Chicken Sausage Mexican Market Soup

(I'll say it here: this recipe has the dumbest name)

This was a really great soup, even if it was spicier than I would've like it. This also made a ton, so I have a big container of it in the freezer for one of those "I don't want to cook and you can't make me" days. 

 

Quick Tuna Casserole

This is my favorite meal to make. Super easy and I realize that it sounds like it would gross from just the ingredients, but give it a try (the recipe is below). Husband and I both love it and we know how rare that is.

 

Master Pizza Dough

I use this recipe for my dough when I'm in a hurry. I think I may have been trying to hurry a little too much this time, though, and didn't allow it to rise properly. Next time, Master Pizza Dough, next time.

 

 

Quick Tuna Casserole
(Adapted from Allrecipes.com, originally posted by Tresa Raymer)
Printable Version

2 packages macaroni and cheese mix

2 pouches of tuna, drained
1 can cream of mushroom soup
1 Tbl seasoned breadcrumbs

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Prepare macaroni and cheese according to directions. Stir in tuna and cream of mushroom soup. Pour mixture into greased 9x9 baking dish. Top lightly with breadcrumbs. Bake 10 to 15 minutes until bubbly. Take out of oven and try not to consume entire dish by yourself (sharing is caring).


Yes I left out the peas. Yes I doubled the recipe. Yes I want my butt to grow three sizes. Don't judge.

Well that's it for now. Off to find some motivation a.k.a. caffeine.

How do you keep sane in the midst of the hurricanes of life??

Just When You Think It's Safe to Get Back in the Water

We're already into the second month of the new year. How did that happen? It feels like just yesterday Husband was putting away the Christmas decorations (and if I had my way, it would've been yesterday).

 

This past week was definitely different. It was the first official week of being completely in our new home. I even meal planned for the week. We were finally settling into a routine when I noticed that something was quite right.

 

Our Mandie is a creature of habit and prefers sleeping in her "chair" over just about anything else (except food; girl loves her Taste of the Wild). However, the past few nights have seen me getting up in the middle of the night to let her drink and go out potty. I haven't gotten up this many times since Melodie was a puppy.

 

While on our walks (which I have been trying to get better about since Mandie was referred to as roly poly at her last check up), Mandie will pee every two feet. Now for dog owners, we know-this is not unusual. It's all about being top dog and peeing on someone else's territory. However, when I say every two feet, I mean literally every two feet. Waddle waddle waddle squat. Waddle waddle waddle squat (hey she's four inches off the ground, not exactly Giselle like). Today was waddle waddle waddle squat and pee blood. HOLY HECK IN A HAND BASKET!

 

Frantic call was made to Husband via my personal electronic leash, which of course he didn't answer. Then it was home as fast as possible, still with the waddling and the squatting. Got home called the vet, made an emergency appointment and was told we could come in early, though, to see if she could be seen. We showed up early.

 

Of course, Mandie was all peed out, so now she's at the vet being waited on hand and foot while this puppy momma is at home FREAKING out and trying to snuggle Melodie who just wants to play outside. The novelty of a front yard has not worn off for that one.

 

Instances like this make me feel like I'm going to be a terrible mother some day. I had every worse case scenario running through my head and was thinking about the horrible invasive procedures they were going to have to perform. When Mandie was taken to the back, it's quite possible I almost started crying. Worst feeling coming home without her. If we don't hear anything by two, I'm supposed to call them but I don't think I'll be able to wait until then.

 

So while this week showed great potential, I'm calling it as a bust. There was much cooking going on in the kitchen, though. I signed up for Allrecipes.com Pro Membership which includes a super cool meal planner. You just choose the meal you want to cook from your recipe box (which is akin to my Pinterest board in the overwhelming amount of recipes it contains) and drag it onto the menu. It automatically generates a grocery list, which I love, because without a list, I blow my grocery budget every time. Here are pictures of the recipes I made this week:

 

Lasagna Alfredo Roll Ups.

 I was really expecting these to be time consuming. They were not. AND even though they were overwhelmingly vegetarian, Husband ate it with no complaints (when in doubt smother it in Alfredo sauce). Keep in mind when using frozen spinach that you want to rinse it and squeeze out any extra liquid, otherwise interesting is the nicest way to describe the way it tastes. I also sauteed some garlic in with my spinach because, well, I heart garlic.

 





 

Taco Pie.

 Again, another super easy recipe but I had to make quite a few modifications which I'll list below.

 



 

A-Maize-Ing Corn Chowder

Surprisingly, while Husband enjoys corn, he doesn't care for soup, so this wasn't a huge hit, except for the bacon on top. I, however, thoroughly enjoyed it and can't think of any changes that I made to it.



 

Baked Chicken

This was quite easily the yummiest meal of the week. Full of flavor and fat, I would totally make it again, but only after a really really really long run.

 



 

Crescent Pizza Pockets

Meh, not sure I'd made these again. Great idea but the proportions of ingredients to the directions was off. Tasty, but a bit aggravating.

 

 

Taco Pie
(Adapted from Allrecipes.com, originally posted by Stephanie)
Printable Version

1 package refrigerated crescent rolls

1 lb ground turkey
1/2 large onion minced

1 package taco seasoning mix

1 minced clove garlic

8 oz. sour cream
1/2 can refried beans

8 oz colby jack cheese

1 cup crushed tortilla chips
 

 

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Lay crescent dough flat on the bottom of a square cake pan and bake according to package directions. DO NOT UNDER BAKE. Meanwhile, brown the ground turkey and saute onions together in a large skillet over medium high heat. Add the taco seasoning and stir together well. In separate bowl, mix sour cream and refried beans together. When dough is done, remove from oven and place meat mixture on top, then layer with sour cream and refried beans and cheese, and then top off with the crushed nacho chips. Return to oven and bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 10 minutes, or until cheese has melted.

Well that's what's happening around these parts. I want to hear from you now. How did your week go?

 

Stop and Go

Well I'm not even sure where to begin. Our scenery has completely changed. At the beginning of this month, we made the move from apartment to house. Still renting, but I enjoy that someone else is footing the bill to replace our exhaust fan and fix our kitchen light. The girls are enjoying have a yard and lots of square footage to sniff. Also, Melodie has become a fireplace whore. Husband is enjoying having a basement office (and let's not kid, so am I; anything to do with cable and been banned on the main floor). I'm not sure what I enjoy most, it's kind of a whole package thing for me.

We finished cleaning the apartment on Saturday (just the carpets, everything else was scrubbed to within an inch of it's life last Sunday). I have never been so happy to be done with a place. When we left our apartment in California, I was sad because we had such great experiences there. With the apartment here, I knew we should have run away screaming when the very first day we were there (less than 24 hours), we had water coming in through the bathroom ceiling fan.

Now, the girls can have crazy zoomies and I don't have to worry about the people underneath. Also, we have a real couch now and my back has never been more grateful.

Where does that leave me and the blog you ask? Why has it been so badly neglected that the number of cobwebs make it look like the Munsters moved in? Glad you asked.

Every since I started blogging, I've struggled with finding a balance between it and real life. I tend to have obsessive tendencies and miss out on things. In an attempt to maintain doing what I love (posting here) and doing what is necessary (apparently it's frowned up to let dogs walk themselves), I will only be posting once a week. My hope is that by only posting once a week, I will be able to produce quality work that someone would actually want to read.

I'm editing my post to add that while I feel like I completely personify The Undomestic Goddess, it drives me bananas that my name doesn't match my url. Since I have no desire to pay for a web address or switch platforms to find one that will allow me to be the Undomestic Goddess, I've decided to create a huge headache for myself and match everything to be Domestically Challenged Grrl. Oh what fresh hell I've stepped in.

So, here's to the new year and whatever it may bring (as long as it's alcohol)!

Wanted: A Book Without a Bite

The Cable Guy bought me a Kindle for Valentine's Day two years ago. I have finished maybe five books in that time, two of them were not mindless dribble. It's possible I only remember the plot to one. Considering I come from a family of avid readers and tend to read rather quickly (although Vanity Fair has taken me fooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeevvvvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrr and I'm still not finished), this is rather unusual for me.

If it has words and a title, I'll read it. Except poetry.  I don't do poetry. Or Shel Silverstein, which I guess is technically poetry. Or Hemingway. That's for a later post, one written after a glass or two or five of wine (that's the only way to do Hemingway). I don't believe in censorship or burning books or anything that limits a person's right to read whatever they want. In fact, if you tell me I shouldn't read something, it's most likely the next thing I have on my bedside table. Reading is also my biggest inspiration when it comes to writing. Often an article or even a blog post from someone else will spark something in me. It's definitely true about the recipes I make.

The thing is, I can't find anything worth reading. Every time I turn around, there's another vampire book or werewolf book or half vampire-half werewolf book. What's wrong with people?! Totally fleshy, living, breathing with a normal amount of hair people?! It's pretty hard to relate to a character that heals instantaneously when I'm still sporting a chicken pox scar from twenty years ago.

Now, I get the escapism aspect of fiction, I really do. My genres of choice are fantasy and science fiction (*Nerd Alert* There may or may not be a rather extensive collection of dragon paraphernalia in our garage, as well as a vast knowledge of Star Trek trivia in my head). You don't get any further from reality than that, yet the best writers still manage to create a world that has something the reader can identify with.

My biggest frustration is the absolute lack of strong female characters, which is only compounded by the overabundance of aloof uninterested males. I would rather a female lead forego a relationship than have to read another conversation featuring what appears to be a caveman. I also love love love when strength is portrayed as a man's inability to stop a woman from doing something incredibly stupid. Believe me, I'm as bullheaded as they come. Rarely do I give an inch when it comes to anything, but do I honestly believe The Cable Guy would just let me walk out a door to confront the coming apocalypse? Yeah, that's a big fat no.

So, I guess I'll stick with rereading the classics. Scarlett and Jo never disappoint. Or if anyone has a suggestion that doesn't include adolescent undead, I'm all ears.

And Now for Something Completely Random

I've been thinking back a lot on the year this past week. There were ups and downs, promotions and stress, weight loss and weight gain. However, the majority of the year was good and I couldn't be more proud of Husband and myself for all the hard work we've done, both together and separately. It makes my little heart sing to watch Husband grow in his new position at his job, as well as my partner in crime. We may not be perfect parents some day, but we'll be imperfect together. 

I'm also proud of what I've accomplished just within the last month. Watching my little blog double in Facebook likes and becoming a FitFluential Sweat Pink Ambassador have me doing a little dance. I ran my first 5k and started training for my first 10k (and haven't wanted to throw up...yet).

What I haven't accomplished in the last month: anything remotely domestic (shocking I know). There has been no meal planning, which means that we've pretty much been eating either whatever gets delivered to the door or whatever can be cooked in two minutes. As a result, my jeans are starting to fit again and my energy level is zero. The carpet manages to get vacuumed, so I'm not a total failure, or at least that's what I keep telling myself. 

Since I don't wanted "undomestic" to become a synonym with "sloth"  I actually sat down and wrote out a menu for the week. I did a double digit amount of laundry and changed our sheets. Then I took a nap.

Okay, not gonna lie sloths are way cute.

 

Source: homebasedbusinessprogram.com via Ben on Pinterest

So, if you see me wandering about aimlessly in the virtual world, be sure to give me a swift kick in the real behind and remind me dishwashers don't unload themselves (if only *sigh*). 

 

Mazel Tov! It's a Green Eyed Monster!

I am not an outwardly emotional person. Family and friends can pretty much rely on me to be happy. Happy to see you, happy to be alive, happy that the NHL season hasn't been cancelled. Other than happy, there really isn't a lot going on in my emotional sandbox.

 

Occasionally, a bit of that sand will work its way into my metaphorical shoe and begin to rub. Nothing major, just enough to create some inflammation. However, over time that red spot will turn into a gaping, weeping, angry wound that has me slamming my laptop shut and folding laundry. *gasp* 

 

The latest annoyance that has me running my washing machine like Seabiscuit has actually been my number one frustration for quite some time now. Back story: when Husband was still Fiance, we came to the agreement of having a Four Year Plan, meaning that we were going to wait until year four of marriage before we decided to have children. After having a strenuous on again, off again long distance relationship, we felt that our first years together would be better spent just the two of us. It was absolutely the right decision for us, but as we near the three and a half year marriage mark (and after a decade together), I have started to hear a very audible biological clock.

 

Oh and let me add, that when people ask when we plan on having children (which pretty much started the second before Husband popped the question), and we tell them about our four year plan, three out of four times, people act like we're completely stupid and will say things like, "Well you'll never be completely ready to have kids." Hell, I'm never completely ready to go to work in the morning, but I go anyway because there are certain things I did ahead of time to prepare myself for whatever might be thrown my way. That followed by the, "Well just remember, you're not getting any younger" comments (one of which was from my former OBGYN!) made me seriously consider being childless by choice. My standard response? "I may not be getting any younger, but at least I'm not getting any uglier."

 

Where was I...oh yes ticking time bomb. Like I said, I know that Husband and I made the right choice for us, but my frustration comes when I see yet another couple who's known each other for a minute and been married for even less time announce that they're golly gee whiz expecting bundle of joy number one (I won't even go into how I feel when it's bundle of joy number two, not enough expletives in the English language). I'm not trying to be petty or mean or by any means diminish what a wonderful thing it is when two people who love each other very much and are committed to one another bring a little human into the world. Just the opposite; I tear up and am thrilled that the little one will be brought into a home filled with love and happiness. Doesn't make me wish any less that it was my home, though.

 

Jealously has a tendency to leave you looking for the worst. I shouldn't be judging people at all, let alone based on the limited knowledge I have of the situation. I should assume that before they got pregnant, they had the same discussions Husband and I have; actually I shouldn't be making assumptions at all. What I should be doing is minding my own business and pray for a happy, healthy baby.

 

So, I wash the same blanket ten times and run in the rain (which is really just going for a run here) and snuggle Mandie and Melodie and try to not look at the calendar, reminding myself my time will come and then I'll be longing for the time when I could have a margarita at noon.

*Race Report* Born Free!

While I can barely move my legs because my hips feel soldered into place, my fingers move just fine and I am here to tell you I survived my first 5k. Go me.

 

I participated in the Free Flight Run on Saturday in Newport, which is about twenty minutes south of where I live (forty if there's traffic, sixty if there's weather too). It was put on by the Coast Hills Running Club, which I didn't even know existed but am glad they do. I trained for exactly two days, one of those runs being on the second time I'd ever run 3.1 miles. (Note: I do NOT recommend that someone train this way. There's no doubt in my mind that I would've completely collapsed after .237 miles had I not had some base for running built up previously. Had I not taken almost two and a half months off from running, I probably would've done much better)

 

The day had me up pretty much every hour from the time I went to bed about four o'clock (which is incidentally, fifteen minutes later from when Melodie insisted that she needed to go potty). Nerves definitely had the best of me, as did the fact that Husband fell asleep on the couch and refused to get up (it's true, I'm one of those people who doesn't sleep well without their significant other. Confession of the day). I finally feel asleep until six and was finally able to wake Husband, who was very confused until I reminded him that it was the day I intended to face my destiny (or some other such nonsense, I was totally incoherent until about seven). Managed to get dressed, pack up my bag (still managed to forget shoes to change into and my watch *forehead slap*), gather up a snack for post race and go. Breakfast was two frozen chocolate chip waffles, which I must not go purchase more of since they are gone (and I love them).

 

We left really early and even with two stops, we still managed to be the first ones there. The registration people were very nice and even though I registered day of (in my defense, I had the paperwork filled out, life just happened and I never managed to get it mailed in), I GOT A SHIRT! It's official: I'll do anything for free stuff.

 

 

I also received my first bib, which will be framed and placed in my office, as a reminder that a) yes I really did run 3.1 miles without stopping and b) it is possible to keep a resolution.

 

 

The race itself kind of scared me, as I guess they had changed the starting place and course layout and people were kind of confused but it was clearly marked and there were lovely volunteers (I believe the local high school cross country team-and I must say that they were some of the nicest teenagers I've met in a very long time) to make sure I didn't end up in the bay and offered up encouragement along the way. Taking the advice of some of my friends on Facebook, I remembered to go slow (pack mentality has been known to really throw off a runner's pace), keep my head up and enjoy the run. Doing all of those helped me appreciate the beautiful water front, the estuary and remind me that it's time to start wearing my contacts again (for the first mile, I was wiping them clear every twenty feet).

 

My official time, if I heard correctly was 39'02" (it was definitely thirty-nine but I temporarily blacked out after that). A personal best for me(!), as I had been running a 44 minute 5k. Now, I could say that I had so much fun, I didn't care what my time was (and I did have a blast!), but I'm really glad that I hit in the thirties, especially without any way, other than listening to my body, to know how I was doing.

 

There was the subsequent eating of bananas and guzzling water (there was also some indulgence of chocolate cookies) and I put on dry clothes, which included my very first race shirt. :)

 

Proud doesn't even begin to describe how I feel. Never have I considered myself a runner, but now, I can't wait to run my next race. There's a Turkey Trot in November and a 10k in March that have my name on them, so I'll have to start taking my training a little more seriously. Tomorrow.

I Am Undomestic, Hear Me Roar!

I feel the need to make some clarifications about what being "undomestic" means. In all actuality, I have a love-hate relationship with the word. On the one hand, I think it clears up any misconceptions that I'm the manicured, dust free, clothes ironed, always have something to whip together at a moment's notice June Cleaver type but on the other hand, it's a rather glaring reminder that I am not the manicured, dust free, clothes ironed, always have something to whip together at a moment's notice June Cleaver type. Sometimes I feel I've single handedly set women back fifty years because of my inability to keep dishes out of my sink and work a forty plus hour work week (Husband also has his complaints about this but seeing as he has the inability to keep his dirty underwear off the bathroom floor, his gripes are summarily ignored).

 

I'm beginning to feel like the pre-fix in my moniker might be synonymous with lazy, except when I realize that both Husband and I have developed the rather impressive talent of dozing off if we so happen to sit still for longer than five minutes. Maybe "lazy" isn't the word I'm looking for; "exhausted" kind of sums things up.

 

There's no pretense of being able to eat off my floors, although, occasionally Mandie will when guinea pig poo is involved. I can't tell you the last time I folded AND put laundry away. Sometimes dinner comes from Subway, or worse yet, a box with an expiration date further out than my golden anniversary. The girls' dog toys sometimes get stumbled over and cursed at and may be put away but most likely not since it will be a matter of moments before Melodie has the box emptied out in her endless search for squeakers.

 

It has been chronicled here that I do have my moments of brilliance. While my participation in the monthly Crazy Cooking Challenge is spotty at best, I try to be a team player. There are several ingredients between my pantry and my refrigerator that could be put together in an attempt to put together a home cooked meal. My washing machine undergoes a thorough scrubbing and running of it's clean cycle bi-weekly, if not weekly, and I've discovered that vinegar is an excellent fabric softener for those of us with epidermis of the sensitive variety.

 

All of these things, the mishaps and triumphs, the mountains of housework and the joys of eating ice cream out of the tub, just happen to be me. I know that Husband didn't marry me because I look perfectly coiffed every time I leave the house; I wasn't that way ten years ago and believe me, there will be no changes in that area anytime soon (except that I have a new found love of mascara-another post entirely). He did marry me, though, because when push comes to shove, I never give up, even if that means getting a few dishes dirty...and then leaving them for him to clean up. 

**Food Friday!!** Soup-er!

I hate being asked what's for dinner. Many hours may be spent menu planning, making sure each meal is unique and tasty, time taken to write it on the board on the refrigerator and still the first words out of Husband's mouth when he comes home, "what're we having for dinner?" WHATEVER APPEARS WHEN I STICK MY @#&%* FOOT IN YOUR BUTT!

*deep breath* Since most days, I don't know if I'm going to receive a call from the Hotel saying that the cookies caught the oven on fire and caused a short in the circuits, so now the elevator is stuck (oh man, why did I put that out into the cosmos), I try to keep my recipes pretty much attention free. This means we eat a lot of soup.

To me, soup can be the perfect independent food, especially if you're essentially dumping everything into a pot, giving it a stir, bringing it to a boil, giving it another stir, turning down the heat and letting it simmer. We also have soup on those days when I have no clue when Husband is coming home, so having a meal that gets better the longer it cooks works out beautifully. This Fast Refried Bean Soup from Taste of Home totally fits the bill.

In the beginning, there was homemade chicken stock. In the ten minutes, I can get it from the store.

Every trip to the grocery store includes three items: corn, black beans and pop. I hate corn, don't drink pop and put black beans in everything (usually to mask the fact that there is corn, which is the only vegetable Husband will eat).

I heart canned refried beans. Since I have to stay away from red meat, I'm very conscientious about making sure I have enough protein in my diet, especially when I'm working out (another reason for the multitude of black beans). Refried beans are a nice change of pace and are perfect spread on a tortilla and covered with cheddar cheese. They also remind me of canned cranberry sauce...

This recipe made a ton, perfect for FFY (Fend For Yourself) days.

There aren't really any classic snack foods in our home. My way of thinking is if it's not in the house, I can't eat it. I do know how to satisfy the occasional snack attack, and tortilla chips fresh from the oven are tasty treats. Preheat oven to 400 degrees, cut tortillas into triangles (or strips, either is easy when you have you're handy dandy pizza cutter), sprinkle with salt and pop in the oven for ten minutes. At five minutes, flip the triangles over to toast the other side. Presto chango! tortilla chips. **note: corn tortillas may take a little longer. I did mine the same amount of time I made Husband's flour ones and they weren't quite as crunchy.

In the end, this meal took about twenty minutes to complete, although it cooked for an hour or two, which I think allowed the refried beans to thicken it up a bit. Was just missing a heaping dollop of sour cream. Must remember to put on grocery list.

What is your favorite no fuss recipe??

5,000 Words

Sometimes when I don't know what to say about what's going on here at Casa de UDG, I feel it's best to let the pictures do the talking.

Melodie makes it ridiculously hard to go to work in the morning. With her soft come-hither-sleepy eyes, willingness to snuggle in any situation and her happiness to share her toys, she's a total triple threat. Nothing relieves more stress that doling out belly rubs to this one, especially when the reward is unlimited kisses.

Oh man oh man oh man. The Safeway gods finally listened. Growing up, I lived for weekends when Paternal Unit would make Puerto Rican food. My conversational Spanish might land us in international hot waters but I can name (and eat) all kinds of dishes from PR. Every birthday for as long as I can remember, I would request arroz con gandules and no matter where we were living, whether in West Virginia, where the nearest Spanish market is two states over, or Michigan, where I could get Grandma Paternal Unit to make it for me, it was always served. That's love.

Recently, I made the mistake of watching an episode of Animal Cops: Philadelphia. Huge mistake, colossal. People who abuse animals make me want to empty my stomach contents on them, see how they like it. When I catch my Mandie girl having a happy moment, rolling all over the floor and making happy growly sounds, it completely and utterly warms my heart and makes me so thankful for the rescue that pulled Mandie out of a kill shelter and put her in Husband's heart (oh OK, mine too).

I heart my coworkers. I heart them even more when they bring me free, like brand new AeroGardens so that I can grow lettuce and basil and thyme and strawberries and lettuce (Bubbles is way excited about the lettuce. So excited he just tossed his water bottle on the ground. For the 16547254785th time). Will keep you updated on the status of my nearly green thumb.

Last but not least, what would a post about my goings on be without my main squeeze (for the record, I have no other squeezes). Husband was recently promoted to a new position and while that means longer hours, phone calls in the middle of dinner (he has two phones on him at all times), paperwork everywhere and frequent trips out of town, I couldn't be more proud of him and the way he's always willing to give every new task 100%. I also love that he still takes his turn taking the girls outside to do their business and makes breakfast on Sundays. And does his own laundry. And leaves his underwear on the bathroom floor (wait, no, I was temporarily delirious from love).

It's been such a busy month and I can't believe it's almost over. So thankful for any and all time my little family has been able to spend together. Always grateful for a moment captured in time.

What are your favorite times caught on camera lately??

**Food Friday!!** That's What I've Bean Trying To Tell You!

I've made it no secret that in order to get Husband to eat food he normally wouldn't but should, I use casseroles. I cannot cannot CANNOT extol the virtues of them enough. Pretty much, I have single handedly broken Husband's picky eating spirit and so, I thank you casserole makers of ol' for paving the way for myself and other undomestics.

Recently, I've been trying to use up some of my stock pile and what do I always have an abundance of? Black beans. The blame for this can be placed on Runnersworld.com and all the articles that insist that black beans will give you wings. When poking around on Pinterest for something yummy, I came across this Six Sisters' Stuff recipe for Easy Bean Enchilada Casserole. *angels singing* This recipe was CLEARLY created for me, as evidenced that it's title includes four of my all time favorite food words.

I think this closely resembles the picture of the original (minus all the yummy garnishes) if I do say so myself.

This recipe calls for enchilada sauce and since I know I can make it from scratch, I can't ever bring myself to buy it at the store (for now, I used to say the same thing about chicken broth).

I didn't have any green chiles (shocking I know) so I used a can of tomatoes with chiles. Same diff.

My pizza cutter has become one of the most versatile utensils in my kitchen.

It is possible to set up an assembly line in a galley kitchen (sort of).

 Voila! (I'll work on my photo editing)

This recipe was delicious and the leftovers the next day were still super tasty. Could've used some sour cream but apparently it's chocked full of these nasty little pant tighteners called calories. Bah humbug calories.

What is your favorite way to eat beans??